Before we dive into this, if you’re feeling a bit lost or lonely and think talking it out could help, why not schedule a quick 15-minute chat with one of my awesome assistants? It’s totally free, and who knows, it might just make your day a bit brighter. Click here to apply for a call
Julien Blanc
Instructor
Let’s get real—when was the last time you told yourself, “I’m a 10 out of 10”? If you’re like most people who struggle with how to stop being a people pleaser, it’s probably been a while, maybe even never. So, what’s holding you back from feeling like you’re enough, just as you are?
In one of my recent events, we dove deep into the concept of seeking approval—from parents, society, or anyone but ourselves. If you’re still chasing after someone else’s validation, you’re missing the most important thing: your own self-worth. To break free and learn how to stop being a people pleaser, it’s crucial to stop looking for approval from others and start defining yourself on your own terms.
Stop Seeking Approval: Essential Steps on How to Stop Being a People Pleaser
You can’t keep defining yourself through someone else’s eyes. Whether it’s the approval of a parent, friend, or colleague, their validation doesn’t define you. You are good enough simply because you exist. One of the key steps in learning how to stop being a people pleaser is to recognize that your worth isn’t determined by external validation. When you live in constant pursuit of others’ approval, you lose sight of who you truly are.
Take this challenge: Look in the mirror today and say, “I’m a 10 out of 10.” Say it out loud and mean it. This isn’t about being perfect in someone else’s eyes; it’s about embracing who you are, right now, in this moment.
How to Stop Being a People Pleaser: Identifying Limiting Beliefs
If you find it difficult to believe that you’re enough, ask yourself why. What old stories or limiting beliefs are you holding onto? Often, these negative beliefs come from past experiences where we were made to feel like we weren’t good enough. One of the most important steps in learning how to stop being a people pleaser is to identify and challenge these limiting beliefs. Who planted those seeds of doubt, and why have you let them grow?
It’s time to uproot these beliefs and start living as your authentic self. If you’re not true to who you are, you’ll end up resenting the people you’re trying to please. But when you embrace your true self, you’ll attract the right people, the right opportunities, and, most importantly, a healthy relationship with yourself.
Overcome People Pleasing: Building Authentic Confidence
To truly stop being a people pleaser, you must start living for yourself. When you spend all your time trying to make others happy, you neglect your own needs and desires. If you want to know how to stop being a people pleaser, begin by prioritizing your own happiness. When you embrace your true self, you’ll naturally attract the right people who appreciate you for who you are, not for the role you play to please them.
Let me ask you: Are you ready to claim your 10 out of 10? The first step to breaking free from the chains of people-pleasing is self-acceptance. Love yourself as you are, and don’t let anyone’s approval—or lack thereof—determine your self-worth.
Final Steps: How to Stop Being a People Pleaser and Embrace Authenticity
Breaking free from people-pleasing isn’t easy, but it’s necessary for true self-worth and confidence. Take time to reflect on your behaviors. Are you doing things to make others happy at the expense of your own well-being? To stop being a people pleaser, you need to make decisions based on your own values and needs, not on the fear of disapproval from others.
Start living for yourself, embrace your uniqueness, and stop seeking validation from external sources. When you do this, you’ll realize that you’re already enough—exactly as you are.
Conclusion: How to Stop Being a People Pleaser and Reclaim Your Life
If you’re asking yourself how to stop being a people pleaser, the key is to let go of the need for external validation and embrace who you are. Start by challenging the limiting beliefs that hold you back, and take ownership of your self-worth. You’re a 10 out of 10, not because someone else says so, but because you are true to yourself.
Signs of being a people pleaser include constantly seeking approval, avoiding conflict, neglecting your own needs to make others happy, and feeling guilty when you put yourself first.
How can I stop being a people pleaser?
To stop being a people pleaser, focus on building self-confidence, challenge your limiting beliefs, and prioritize your own needs and happiness. Embrace authenticity and stop seeking external validation.
Why is it important to stop being a people pleaser?
It’s important to stop being a people pleaser because it leads to burnout, resentment, and a loss of self-identity. Living authentically allows you to build healthier relationships and live a more fulfilling life.
How can I build self-confidence and stop seeking approval?
Building self-confidence starts with accepting who you are and letting go of the need for external approval. Practice self-affirmations, challenge negative thoughts, and take small steps toward living authentically.
What are the long-term effects of being a people pleaser?
The long-term effects of being a people pleaser include low self-esteem, difficulty setting boundaries, and constantly feeling unfulfilled. By stopping this behavior, you can regain control of your life and build stronger, more authentic relationships.
Julien Blanc
Since 2010, Julien Blanc has been traveling the world and has personally coached tens of thousands of clients face to face in over 40 countries... And millions online.